How are you? A Pregnancy State of Mind


When I ask “How are you?”
You may even answer “I don’t know” my name is Greta Gill I’m a Certified Nurse
Midwife. You probably have some pregnancy
discomforts come to mind right away. I’m tired, I’m uncomfortable, I’m swollen, my
back hurts, my bladder feels too small, but what I’m really asking is “How are
you?” Pregnancy emotions are powerful and ever-changing and sometimes you can feel
like your moods are in control and rather than the other way around and so
I want to bring light to how common and normal the experience of going through
all kinds of emotions is during pregnancy but I also want to give you
information on what’s not normal and when you may need to seek help. So
getting back to the question of “How are you?” You may answer “I’m so excited I’m full
of joy, I can’t wait to meet my baby this is the most invigorating time I’ve ever
experienced in my life” and if that is you then I say celebrate and be ecstatic
and enjoy it. “You may say I’m nervous, I’m scared, I’m unsure, I’m worried and I also
want to say that is normal. That’s part of the work of pregnancy because all of
these things are happening the magical formation of a new baby, your body is
growing the baby, your body knows how to birth the baby and your body knows how
to nourish the baby and all of that is happening without you having to think
about it. It’s not unconscious control of course. You are in control of what you
eat and you do choose to get prenatal care
and you can choose to exercise and you can choose to take a prenatal vitamin or
not to smoke but a lot of what pregnancy is, is surrendering to what
your body knows how to do and to have trust and faith in that process. When I
ask “How are you?” you may even answer I don’t know, I feel ambivalent and I want
to say that that’s also really common, makes sense that it is because 50% of
pregnancies are not planned and so many women find themselves in a state of not
feeling sure of having to grapple with conflicting emotions or changing plans
or changing relationships and I often say to my patients that you know though
pregnancy lasting 40 weeks can feel like a really long time and they in a huge
test of your patience it’s probably also a blessing because that 40 weeks gives
you time to transition it gives you time to work in relationships, to change where
you’re living, to adjust in your job to do all the things that you need to do to
prepare for this newest member of your family.

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